4ths Captain
Mike Kaye

Jan 06 - enlarge

11th March - Nottingham 2 Bridge 5ths 0

25th Feb - Nottingham 5 Leek 2

LEEK, STIR- FRIED

Club’s Top Scorer* leads the way!

Two more magnificent strikes from David “Avian” Rogers and a brace from Duncan “Lucky” Llewelyn took Team 4 into what may well prove to be the Premier’s third place play off final against Cannock 5 next Saturday.

When Stephen Yallop stepped up to take the penalty flick, it was 2-2 and Leek were proving to be beligerant opposition – a team blended with promising youth, a touch of lariness and older guile (sounds familiar, I agree, but this report will not be dwelling on those particular virtues of the club’s pearl necklace. That has been well documented elsewhere and would be bordering on the repetitive.). Leek, by the way, are a club on the up: Friday night coaching on their new astro pitch – just 1 mile from their ground – attracts up to 80 youngsters and they are able to field 11 sides each week. Their ladies also feature extensively and exclusively (unless one counts a couple of beever shots in Naturalist Monthly readers’ wives) in an ill-advised calendar shoot for 2006. It is hung behind the bar at Goosedale but that is another story and exactly how the months of January and February came to be stuck together is a also a subject of conjecture (and it is not fair to say that David Rogers was spotted through the bar shutters, polishing the glasses. At least that’s what he claimed to be doing with his damp tea towel).

Back to the turning point. It was a fine thing to see the young Yallop seize the ball and claim the flick. Some may claim it was the quickest he’d moved all afternoon, but that would be unkind so we’ll leave it there. He coolly despatched it left and into the middle of the net with confidence and surety. The keeper had, it is fair to say, fuck all chance of stopping it.

This quickened the home side’s pulse and two more splendid goals duly followed. The Llewelyn goal was a beautiful combination of his audacious poacher’s eye, his apparently high levels of positive karma and a flukey-ness which some of us can only stand back and admire. Or celebrate, come to think of it.

The “team goal”? It involved Gallagher and Rogers only but it rather fittingly encapsulates that about our game which we love so much: an energetic jab and dash from Andy “ the Greyhound” Gallagher put him through into the D, face to mask with the keeper. Showing perfect awareness of Rogers lurking nearby, he slipped it square to the best left winger in the club who duly rifled it in. Passion, vision and class – a move right out of the team 4 textbook: “The Beautiful Enigma of Hockey” (soon to be published by Random Hoose). And proof , if proof were needed, that Gallagher practises just what he preaches.

Meanwhile, Joe “the goal” Cole’s shoulder is proving troublesome and he may have to miss the final 4 games of a lively, always interesting season. If this proves to be the case, we wish him well for he is fine custodian of the net and whilst his literary efforts may require a little more polish, the team appreciates his presence in the gaol. Sorry, goal.

A special mention also has to go to Chris “Beefy” Baker, who flew in from his yankey court in Connecticut (sic). His ability to find space and move into it remains intact, but his new found bulk means even the toughest North Notts boy would think twice before “havin’ a go”. A pleasure to have him guesting.

And so, with Britton and Lagerberg once more showing epic appetites for the game, and oodles of quality, it came to pass that Team 4 won the match by 5 goals to 2.. And, verily, they continue in their quest for the Holy Grail, for the elusive Third Rock from the Moon. And let it be known that this writer liketh that metaphor very much and thinketh it indeed a quest worthy of pursuit. Cannock 5s, next Saturday – now that serveth to watereth the mouth. “OOH OOH MAMA!” as James Brown might say and as Andrew “Life on Mars” Gallagher shouted out on at least 5 occasions during an audacious raid on the bookies at the Greyhound track on Saturday night.

For indeed, the excitement did not end there. In fact, this was a cracking Saturday’s entertainment, with the suave Mr Gallagher replenishing his lost wallet with a fist full of cash, a dash of the brash and a gallon of flash. A marvellously drunken night out, enjoyed by players from every team and, doubtless, one we will be repeating soon.

* With Dharminder Singh being on loan to Sikh Union (33 goals and counting!), this makes Rogers the official top scorer for the club. On current form, he should be in the 2s, left wing, no danger.

Report: MJK

And by popular demand -
Captn Kaye's last report from the archives. Leek 12th November
Bridg victory (DL) - Bridgford 26th November
Edge 1-0 loss (MJK) - Egde 10th Dec
Barford 1 - 8 w (DL) - Barford 14th Jan
Cannock 2 -1 L (MJK) - Cannock 21st Jan
Bridge 5 - 2 w & night out (AG) - Bridge 28th Jan
Brum Uni 6-0 w (PY) - B'ham Uni 4th Feb
Beeston - pearl neclace (MJK) - Beeston 12th Feb

League Updates available at MRHA